Extend the Death Penalty to People who Comment without Reading the Whole Article

I think the government of the United States of America should be legally able to execute someone who didn’t read the whole article before commenting.

Let me put it bluntly and in all caps: IF YOU COMMENT WITHOUT READING THE WHOLE ARTICLE, I WISH THERE WAS A LAW THAT SAYS IT’S OKAY FOR THE GOVERNMENT TO KILL YOU.

Now hear me out. I’m all for nonviolence. But it’s much easier to be nonviolent toward people who read the entire article before commenting. And those people who do not read the article should pull themselves up by their bootstraps, use the very basic education they received most likely from the taxpayer, via public schools and Sesame Street, and actually fucking read something for once, instead of continually barfing some radio and/or youtube personality’s turds out of your own mouth.

I’m just kidding about the death penalty.

 

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